Please Don't Take my Sunshine Away
by ditchmydismay
Summary: "It's funny how I never gave up on anything, but why did ever I give up on you?" As his life slowly comes to an end, with his regrets wilting away with him. She tries her best to keep her ray of sunshine glowing, for her, even for the last time. Because all know a cherry blossom can never live without its sunshine.
1. Find a Girl like your Mother Pt 1

Spring had come to Konoha, and the land was all too happy to show it. Cherry blossom petals flitted almost playfully in the cool breeze, slowly coming to rest on the ground in a carpet of pink. The streets were filled with excited chatter from young and old alike, mingling with the chirping of the myriad of birds that perched atop the posts and buildings. Everyone was excited to shed their winter clothes and bask under the warm sun, especially after a rather harsh season of snow. Spring had come, and everyone wanted to spend its first days outside amongst the blooming sakura.

Everyone.

Everyone but the Hokage.

He was surrounded by white; from the walls, to the floor tiles, to the ceiling itself. Wires were attached to his body, feeding data into machines that lined the side of his bed. The constant beeping slowly dragged Uzumaki Naruto into depression. Tired cerulean eyes drifted from the curtains that blocked the only window, to the four corners of his sterilized room. It was a place equipped with the latest in medical ninjutsu tech, fit for a kage. But for Naruto, it was no better than a stale, empty prison.

 _I don't belong here_ , he thought. _I should be back at the office, working on those bills and papers. Shikamaru must be throwing a fit, with me leaving behind all those pain-in-the-ass duties. I should be getting back there soon… Dammit_.

His head throbbed. According to the good doctor, he wasn't supposed to stress himself, and yet there he was, worried about work. He wasn't even supposed to do that either; at his age, retirement should have been the logical option. But the thought of doing nothing while stuck at home just did not sit well with him. He'd rather work the entire day away within the Hokage Tower.

 _What if I do what that pervy old man did?_ _Maybe it wouldn't be half as bad._

A single tear rolled down his cheek at the thought. His adventures with the legendary Sannin was nothing short of… legendary. He could do that, travel the world, learn new things, seek inspiring adventures at every turn. Those sound infinitely better than lying inside a lifeless hospital room. Then again, the moment he so much as stand up, his wife would immediately send him back to bed.

Speaking of which…

"Um… Naruto-kun?"

The door opened, revealing a woman with purple hair and a worried smile plastered on her face. Hyuuga- no, Uzumaki Hinata entered, a young woman with the same hair locks in tow - Himawari, their daughter. The smile on her face was sincere, and she approached her father with glee.

"Hi, Dad." she said. "I brought you these."

She held up a bunch of sunflowers, which she then put into an empty vase atop the bedside table. Naruto couldn't help but smile. Himawari's cheer was infectious.

"Thank you. They're beautiful," he said, which made his daughter's smile wider.

"N-Naruto-kun," Hinata muttered, taking her place next to Himawari. Naruto shifted his eyes on her. There was a time when he saw Hinata as a beautiful woman he could love. The long years had done nothing to change that, except perhaps for how he felt about it.

"I brought what you asked for." She rummaged inside her bag and pulled out a length of faded material. The sight of it filled his heart with overflowing joy. With a shaking hand he reached out to grab it, thinking about how something so simple as a scarf could seem so important.

A scarf...

...that his dear mother made for him.

His weathered face broke into a gentle grin. He clutched it to his chest, running a thumb over its soft fleece, remembering the one time his mother wrapped him in a hug. The memory felt like refuge in front of the hearth - secure, and most of all, warm. The green striped muffler was old, and worn-out. It had clearly seen better days, yet Naruto would not have it any other way.

"It was k-kinda hard looking for it," Hinata mumbled. "I-I don't know why you'd still want an old one. I knitted you a couple of scarves, already."

"Speaking of which... here, Naruto-kun." She took out another scarf - this time a red one - and laid it on top of his husband's chest, right atop the green scarf. It reminded Naruto of blood for some reason. "Just in case the other one isn't warm enough. Rather, I-I think it would be better for you to use this."

Naruto turned to stare at the scarf Hinata had in her hands. A second passed in silence, and another one. Hinata drew herself back, unsure of what to do next. "U-Um, I think I'll just leave it -"

Two hard knocks, and then the door opened without ceremony. A nurse came in, with an outfit as white as the floor she walked on. She made a wide grin, something she probably had to use hundreds of times with hundreds of patients.

"Hokaga-sama, how are you- oh." Only when she was next to the bed did she notice the presence of Hinata and Himawari. "I'm sorry. I didn't know your family is visiting Hokage-sama. Greetings, Lady Hinata, and Himawari."

The nurse bowed to the two, which also did likewise.

Naruto smiled. "It's no trouble. Anyway, what is it?"

"Ah yes! I hope this isn't short notice, but Tsunade-sama is here to speak to you."

And then there she was, the legendary Sannin and former Hokage, striding purposefully towards Naruto, not bothering to spare the nurse a second glance. Tsunade stood next to both mother and daughter, fixing them a stern stare.

"I'm sorry, but could you go visit this blockhead some other time? I wanna discuss something important with him," the blonde said in a tone that left no room for disagreement.

"O-Of course, Tsunade-sama."

Hinata hesitated for a moment, before placing the red scarf next to the vase of sunflowers atop the bedside table. "I'll just place it here, Naruto-kun, if ever you need it."

She tugged on Himawari's hand, pulling them across the room. The young woman shot one last look of longing at her father, before she closed the door behind her.

"Bye dad." Naruto heard her say.

He turned his attention to the imposing figure standing next to him. The air was tense, and the nurse took this chance to quietly slip out of the room. The silence seemed to go on for minutes. Then suddenly a grin broke out on the Sannin's youthful face, and she began to chuckle.

"Look at you now, Naruto," she said, raising an eyebrow and pinching his lined cheek. "Remember all those times you teased me? Who's old _now_ , eh?"

"Come on, you know I was only kidding… _Baa-chan_." Both of them broke out into laughter, except Naruto's ended in a coughing fit that wracked his chest with pain. Tsunade's brows knit in worry, and she put a hand on Naruto's chest. A green glow emanated from the point of contact, a manifestation of the chakra Tsunade was using to diagnose Naruto's condition.

Judging from the way she frowned, it wasn't anything good.

"I'll spare you the specifics and get straight to the point," Tsunade said. "Your health is deteriorating, Naruto. You... don't have much time left. I can't do anything to reverse it unless I can somehow implant you with this." She pointed to the purple gem sitting atop her forehead. It was the focal point of her chakra, the unique way she maintained her youthfulness despite her advanced age.

"Do you want me to?" Tsunade said.

Naruto considered her offer. She made it sound like he had no other choice, but Naruto knew she was hoping he'd take it. But then she knew him better than that. She must know his answer even before it left his lips.

"I don't need it anymore, Baa-chan," Naruto said with a soft smile. "I've done enough. I've made a lot of friends, met a lot of people, including my parents, and did a lot of crazy things over the years, all for the sake of protecting everyone I care about, and fulfilling my dream of being Hokage. So, I'm done. I... I have no regrets."

Yes. Yes, he did. That one regret that kept him awake at night. But he just wasn't going to admit it to Tsunade, or to anyone.

The Sannin chuckled, like that one aunt who cared a lot, sometimes too much. "Why am I not surprised? You're as headstrong as the first time I met you. Still, at least I tried. Anyway," her expression turned serious, "I did say I can't reverse it, but we can slow it down. Now, not one nurse or doctor or medical ninja in Konoha is strong enough to do that, except for me and..."

"And? And who, Baa-chan?" Naruto asked, raising an eyebrow.

"And her."

As if on cue, there was another couple of knocks on the door. Naruto held his breath as it opened, revealing pink hair framing a face he could never forget no matter how many times he tried. Her green eyes sparkled in the morning light, and her lips were drawn into a sweet if somewhat strained smile. The years had done nothing to diminish her beauty. All this time, his heart still jumped at the sight of her.

Their eyes met, and Naruto melted into nostalgia as cherry-tinged memories washed over him. The one regret in his chest pounded more and more until it hurt. He almost didn't hear Tsunade when she spoke up about the new arrival.

"Good to see you here, Sakura," she said, beckoning her pupil to come closer. "Thanks again for volunteering for this."

"It is the least I can do, Tsunade-sama," Sakura said, never keeping her eyes off of Naruto.

"Wait, what do you mean, 'volunteer'?" Naruto asked.

"Good question. I called a meeting of all Konoha medical staff when you were admitted to this hospital to brief them on your situation. I asked for volunteers, but really everyone there knew that Sakura would be the obvious choice."

"By the way, I bought you something, Na- I mean . . .Hokage-sama." Naruto noticed the plastic bag in Sakura's hand. She brought out a take-out bowl from it, and Naruto didn't need to smell the chicken broth to know it was a bowl of his favorite Ichiraku ramen.

But he thought about her pause, that momentary hesitation that told more than he wanted to know, and hurt more than a kunai to the chest. They couldn't be as they were before, where they could freely call each other by name without caring about anything else.

"I never actually told you what she'll be volunteering for. From this point on, Sakura will be your personal nurse," Tsunade broke in.

That came in harder than a sucker punch. "W-what?" Naruto said.

"She's the only one qualified to take care of you."

"Oh. Is that so…" his words trailed off as he studied the profile of the woman who he'd probably spend most of his time with for a long, long while. He still wasn't sure whether he felt like lying on a bed of roses or nails when he considered that.

"Yes. Any complaints?" Tsunade asked. Naruto shook his head, because there wasn't a single reason - well, maybe one reason - why he would complain about the set-up.

"Good. I'll leave you two so you can settle into things. Take care now, Naruto. See you, soon."

Naruto gave a feeble wave, grinning as best as he could. Sakura bowed dutifully as her master stepped out the door. Once it clicked close, the atmosphere became such that you could either hear a pin drop, or cut the tension with a knife.

And of course, Naruto couldn't help but look over his teammate. He saw her eyes, sparkling yet marred with a certain sadness. He followed the length of her hair, which now fell smoothly across her back. It reminded him of his dear mother. It reminded him too well of how much he wanted to run his hand through those pink locks.

"What happened to us?" he said abruptly, laughter bleeding into the words.

"I don't know," Sakura said, looking towards the window, not meeting his gaze. Naruto could almost see the shimmer in her eyes, the slight trembling of her lower lip. "It's just that... Whatever it is, I don't like it."

Keeping her head low, Sakura put down the ramen bowl in her hands to the bedside table. Or, she tried to, but the table was already crowded.

"Oh, it's okay. You can put it here." He scrambled to pull the red scarf off the table, but in his haste he managed to take down the vase with it.

"Naruto!" Sakura exclaimed, but it was too late. The vase had already shattered on the floor before she could even react.

"Come on..." she sighed, turning to look at the blonde with a frown. It quickly lightened into a smile halfway through. "Seriously, you're so clumsy."

She walked over to the other side of the room and took out a broom and a dustpan from the closet in the corner. She swept the broken shards, deposited them in the trash can by the door, and then picked up the sunflowers. "What a waste. These are really beautiful flowers. Maybe I can go to the reception for a new one. I'm sure they won't mind if the Hokage's nurse asks," Sakura said. Naruto was suddenly too busy dwelling on the words 'Hokage' and 'nurse' put together that he almost didn't hear the next question.

"Who gave these flowers to you?"

There was a very long pause before Naruto answered. And even then he couldn't bear to look straight into Sakura's eyes. Those beautiful, beautiful eyes. "Himawari did. She picked them up for me. She came here earlier with Hinata."

He didn't look, because he didn't want to see what went across Sakura's face when he spoke. Thinking about it, he realized that she would have come across his wife and daughter earlier in the hallway. Definitely. _What happened?_ he wondered. _Did they talk? Or... Something? Dammit, I'm thinking too much about it._

"And the red scarf," Sakura said, breaking into his thoughts. "It's the one Hinata made for you, right?"

"...Yes," he said, still staring at a spot on the far wall.

Another silence passed between them, neither willing to shatter it. Naruto didn't want it to be this way. They have both already made their decisions a long time ago. There was nothing that could do about that now, as much as Naruto wanted to think otherwise. If not for that, then least Naruto wished for some semblance of what they were before all this happened, when they were close friends who went through life-or-death situations together. Silence would help neither of them; it would only widen the impassable gap between them. And yet for all his thinking, Naruto couldn't bring himself to utter a single word.

"It's no good settling in the past, right?"

Naruto's eyes focused on Sakura then, hiding his surprise. Her voice was soft, almost like a whisper. He didn't answer. He only watched as Sakura promptly turned away and used the direct line to request for a new vase to be brought to his room. When she was done, she gave him a small smile, as if the last thirty seconds never happened.

"I bet you're hungry," Sakura said, glancing at the cup of ramen on his bed tray. "It's better for you not to move too much. I'll help you."

"You're going to feed me?" Naruto asked, still not taking his eyes off her.

"Honestly, the way you are now you should be eating from a tube. But I figured I'd let you eat your favorite before that happens."

Sakura gave a light chuckle, and it melted Naruto's heart. That laughter had been and forever would be imprinted in him. Sakura combed her hair behind ear, and using a pair of wooden chopsticks she grabbed a large helping of noodles.

"Here." She gently blew on the noodles before she lifted chopsticks to his lips. Naruto only stared at her. Not at the fact that Sakura-chan was feeding him ramen, but at the way she looked at that moment. "Na- Naruto. What is it?"

"Ah, it's nothing really," Naruto smiled sheepishly. "You just remind me a lot of my..." Naruto shifted his gaze to the worn-out scarf he was holding.

"I remind you of your muffler?" Sakura simply smiled and reached out to touch delicate material. "It's really soft, and beautiful. Did Hinata make it as well?"

Naruto took a moment to gulp down a mouthful of noodles. It wasn't as easy as it was before, when he could devour entire bowls in a matter of minutes. When had he become so old?

"No. My mom made it," Naruto answered as he caressed the fabric. Their hands passed close to each other, neither of them aware of it. "It's the only thing I have left from her," he said with a hint of sadness. Their hands finally met, the edge of their fingers touching. Their eyes met, Naruto's blue staring into Sakura's green. "It also matches your eyes," he admitted, never breaking either contact.

Sakura was the first one to break away, withdrawing her hand to hold the ramen cup still as she picked up another chopstick full of noodles. "I only met your dad," Sakura said, a light touch of red on her cheeks. "It would be nice meeting your mom too."

She brought the chopsticks to Naruto's mouth, and the old Hokage ate. The nostalgic taste of the ramen brought back memories, and it made him happy inside. ' _I think she would love meeting you too, Sakura-chan'_ Naruto thought, and he found himself thinking how nice it would be if that really happened.

"You need to take your medicine after finish this," Sakura reminded him, her voice taking on that professional quality. But there was a bright smile on her face.

"As you say, nurse Sakura," Naruto smiled back, not just because of Sakura's mirth, but because the silence had finally passed. Maybe, just maybe, they could still return to that time before all the wrong decisions were made.

 _To be Continued~_

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 **A/N:** I think this would be my first and last fanfic for the naruto fandom before saying goodbye to it completely. I still love NaruSaku, it will be always in my heart. I just really need to complete this fic so I can say that I contributed something to my beloved fandom.

I hope you guys like this story. I cried a lot of times thinking about ideas for this fic / I even cried on the bus and jeepney. Thank you!


	2. Find a Girl like your Mother Pt 2

He was used to waking up in a dimmed bedroom, heavy curtains that repel the beautiful sunlight that the morning promises, and his dark haired wife beside him. Her long hair sprawled over their bed. He would get up, eat breakfast with or without his family, and afterwards be the one he always dreams to be. He'd be coped up in the Hokage tower, overlooking his beloved village. Seeing his face on the Hokage mountains assured him that he wasn't dreaming.

But it was a sight that reminded him that he was back into reality again. A reality where his regrets comes back and haunts him.

He stirred in his sleep as he felt a soothing breeze against his skin. The gentle air gave off a sweet smell that reminds him whenever he walks the streets of Konoha on a spring afternoon. He leaned towards the succulent fragrance, slowly opening his eyes to know where the scent came from. The curtains of his room were opened making the room bright and warm instead of a dull lifeless prison that usually greets him. The window slightly opened just enough to make the petals on an overlooking cherry blossom tree slowly enter his room. He smiled that the scene, spring has always been favorite season. It gives off a warm vibe and a happy glow to everyone.

Naruto slowly sat up still feeling the medicine that Sakura gave him then rubbed sleep from his eyes. The sun generously made his room warm and inviting. The calm wind lulling him back to sleep. He looked around the room only to find her asleep by his side. Body leaned on his bed and her arms was resting beneath her head. Seeing fallen petals on her hair made him beam. It was like spring was meant for her. Naruto reached out to get the stray blossoms from her head but noticed his hand was rested on her hair. He took the opportunity to feel her long tresses under his feeble hand, feeling the softness of it. He smiled as he remembered the moment she decided to cut her long strands. Short or long, she would still look beautiful. Remembering the first time he saw her, it was also a spring day. A girl bullied because of her large forehead hidden behind her pink tresses. She'd always saw her brow as a curse but for him it was something that made her different from others. He continued stroking her hair noticing that it was the longest that it has been. He leaned backwards resting on his headboard.

Since he was a kid, he dreams day and night what would it be like to be with her, even now. Even now, that it's too late. He should be ashamed of himself for thinking of it. He sighed deeply, seeing her resting beside him made him wonder what would it feel like to wake up beside her? Would it be different if he'd marry her? How many times did he imagine a family with her? He always imagined them having a boy, someone who has her eyes and his hair. He would be a very handsome kid indeed. Or maybe he would have pink hair, just like his mother.

 _Just like his mother's huh?_ He chuckled mentally. Imagining a boy with bright pink hair, some may tease him for having such a girly color for his hair but he'd love it because its his mom's.

A waft of nostalgia hit him as he reminisce the moment he met his mom. He hugged her tightly like there's no tomorrow. She told him a little back story of herself. She was bullied because of her long red locks. The red hot bloody habanero as they called her. She beats up anyone who has ever teased her. He was surprised that anyone would bully her because of her beautiful set of hair. However, his mom assured him that there was a person that liked her hair and it was his father. He loved every part of her even though the thing she was ashamed of the most and Minato's feelings for her never wavered.

" _Find a girl just like your mother."_

It was a faint voice in the back of his head. The voice has been evident since the day after he met his mother. A small reminder to find a girl that is similar to her. Finding and knowing this wonderful woman up close made him feel that he was the luckiest man on earth. The girl may be scary when she gets angry and people might see her as a threat to their masculinity. Her strength never bother him he even admired it, except for the fact that she can beat him senseless if he does something perverted. She was strong and fierce yet caring and understanding at the same time. She was smart and nimble, always thinking what to do first. She was never brash unlike him. He always watched her. He knew her every flaw, her weaknesses. He'd witnessed how she cried, how she broke down, how she suffered again and again. But he'd seen her stood up in every problem they faced, just how wise, selfless, incredibly cool and beautiful she was. He watched her bloom into a lovely flower. This was the girl. This was the girl his mother told him to find. This was the girl who was always by his side through thick and thin. This was the girl that saved him. This was the girl that he trusted. This was the girl he'd set his eyes on from the very start. This was the girl he admired for so long. This was the girl that held his heart.

This was also the girl he didn't marry. This was the girl that he didn't have his children with. This was the girl who picked someone who doesn't love her. This was the girl that he didn't choose. This was the girl that he gave up. And he regretted it every single day.

Tears flowed out of his eyes as he realized how painfully close he was to marrying this girl. All he had to do was tell her he loved her. But he didn't. He wanted to laugh at himself for being so stupid. He did everything in his lifetime. He saved his best friend. He became the hero. He became his lifelong dream, a Hokage.

However he couldn't even comply on the one simple request that his beloved mother asked him to do. It's bad enough that he can't forgive himself from it. But what would his mother think? It was the only thing that she hoped him for him before she died. Negative thoughts filled his head. She would be disappointed in him. He doesn't want to think that his dear mother frowning at him.

" _Naruto, why?"_ He gripped his mother's hand made scarf tightly. He imagined his mother saying it, her face crestfallen because of his decision. Tears that filled his eyes slowly run down his face. His mother means the world to him. Even though she never had the chance to see him grow, never got a chance to take care of him, she loved him so much that she would died for her own child. And this is how he repay her? He never meant to disappoint his mother. He wanted her to be proud of him. But how could she, if her only son didn't care about her dying wish. She did everything for him even in the short period of time they were together. How can his mother forgive him? How－

"Naruto?" A soothing voice called out. "Naruto?" It repeated. Blue eyes wandered to where the comforting sound came from. A familiar figure crossed his view.

"Sa- Sakura-chan."

"Are you alright? Why are you crying?" Sakura asked. She reached out and wiped his tear streaked cheeks. From there, he snapped out of his trance. He focused on the woman in front of him. "Are you in pain?" He was. He was in so much pain. Though not from his ailments. Tears continue to drop from his red brimmed eyes. "Naruto, please tell me. Where are you hurt?" He captured one of her hands and placed it on his chest. _Here_ , he cried. _It hurts so much here_. Confused by his actions, she was about to question him but he offered her a painful smile. He looked so broken and disheartened.

 _You could have been mine._ He thought, as he looked deeply into her eyes. _I loved you for the longest time_ , as he softly squeezed her hand on his heart. All the 'what ifs' and 'what could have been' flashed his mind. It was painful but it was too late for that now. "What's wrong?" She asked, he just shook his head.

"Sakura-chan." He started as he lifted his other hand to tuck her hair behind her ear. He carefully leaned forward. Warm lips upon a soft brow. It was a simple gesture. Something he'd been meaning to do for a long time but never had a chance to do it. He regretted never saying she was beautiful even though she had a large forehead. He hoped that this was enough. His kiss lingered for a few moments making the women taken back by his actions. He wrapped his arms around her afterwards and rested his head her should. "I'm sorry." He muttered. "Please forgive me." He clinged miserably on her as if trying to take his pain away. This was the girl he supposed to marry. The girl that can make him smile throughout the day. The girl that he admired for years. The girl that can make his heart beat anytime. He leaned on her chest feeling her warmth, hearing her heart pound. A single tear left him before he succumbs into a quiet slumber he whispers . . .

ごめんなさい, お母さん

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 **A/N:** Sorry it took so long to update. I'm losing inspiration and motivation to write it since I'm drifting away from the fandom.  
But nevertheless I will continue it :) There's an art inspired by this chapter. It was drawn by pushuberaia in tumblr in her narusaku tag. It's the one with Naruto's hand and Sakura's hair.

Thank you again ! I hope you like it! As always R & R ~ It gives me hope.


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